New Jersey Divorce Lawyer Blog
An Essential Guide for Parents Navigating a Difficult Transition
New Jersey child custody mediation can seem somewhat confusing, if not overwhelming, on first blush. emotionally, In the grand scheme of a New Jersey divorce case, mediation is designed to help parents build a parenting plan that protects their children’s interests and well-being. Coming to a better understanding and preparing for mediation can make the process far less concerning and significantly more productive. This New Jersey child custody mediation is designed to provide you with an essential overview of the ins and outs of the process.
Understanding the Purpose of New Jersey Child Custody Mediation
In order to enhance your comfort level for the mediation process, and in advance of your first session, it is crucial to understand what child custody mediation does—and does not—do. Keep in mind that in New Jersey, mediation is required in most cases involving custody disputes unless there is a history of domestic violence. It is also important to fully understand that a mediator does not take sides or issue rulings or decisions in a case. Instead, child custody mediators in New Jersey can be said to work collaboratively toward a parenting plan focused on the child’s best interests. In the end, mediation strives to reduce conflict, shorten court involvement, and encourage long-term co-parenting stability.
Collecting and Organizing Essential Documents
Preparation begins with collecting documents that will help you make practical, child-centered decisions. Suggested items include:
- Your child’s school calendar and extracurricular schedules
- Medical records, therapy schedules, and health-care provider information
- Work schedules for both parents
- Holiday, vacation, and transportation details
- A list of extended family or childcare providers
Collecting and organizing these documents better ensures that you will be in the best possible position to develop a parenting plan through the mediation process that not only satisfies the best interests of your child or children but meets your need as a parent as well. Make sure you bring copies of these documents and materials to the mediation and provide a set of these items to the mediator. You likely will need to prepare a copy for the other party as well.
Clarifying Your Custody Goals
Parents oftentimes enter into the mediation process unsure of what arrangements they truly want when it comes to the children. Make certain to spend time reflecting on both legal custody (decision-making authority) and physical custody (where the child lives). Consider a variety of factors that include:
- Do you want joint legal custody or sole legal custody?
- What weekly schedule supports school, sleep, and emotional balance?
- Are overnights feasible for both parents?
- How should major decisions – education, medical care, activities – be made?
Preparing a Proposed Parenting Schedule
When it comes to getting ready for New Jersey child custody mediation, preparing a detailed proposed schedule can anchor productive discussion during the process. In New Jersey, parents commonly build schedules around a number of possible scenarios
- 2-2-3 rotation (frequent transitions, good for younger children)
- Alternating weeks (fewer transitions, better for teens)
- Split weekends (such as every other weekend plus a weekday overnight)
Make sure you pay heed to these considerations as well in regard to a proposed schedule:
- Include weekday routines
- Weekend time
- Holiday divisions
- Summer schedules
- Special events
Establishing Communication Guidelines
As is the case with mediation itself, in the final analysis, successful co-parenting depends on respectful and predictable communication. In preparing for mediation, consider strategies that you will be able to utilize when it comes to communication and co-parenting when the divorce proceedings have drawn to an end and a new chapter in your life as a parent commences. Some examples of communication tactics can include:
- Weekly email check-ins
- Shared parenting apps
- Rules regarding last-minute schedule changes
- How to handle disagreements before returning to court
The bottom line is that New Jersey courts consistently encourage structured communication methods because that practice can reduce conflict in child custody cases. Presenting a communication plan signals responsibility and readiness when it comes to the mediation process itself.
As a final thought, the parties to a divorce are the center of mediation – not legal counsel. Therefore, even if a person is represented by a New Jersey divorce lawyer, this level of preparation is vital. Call the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen at (201) 845-7400 for a free consultation.
